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girl talk

2019 goals + realities

Posted in Lifestyle
on 01/03/2019

A VERY HAPPY 2019 TO Y’ALL! In the midst of all of the chaos that has been my life for these past two months, I have not been present on my fave lil corner of the web. For that I’m sorry! Senior year has really got me goin craaaazy (in the best/worst ways). BUT I am back for a lil #girltalk #realtalk which happens to be y’alls favorite to read and mine to write! This post could seriously be ALLL over the place but I think that’s the point of a #realtalk. It’s not always going to be the most linear, easy-to-follow kind of post but it’s gonna be a good ole venting session and who doesn’t need one of those?!

Now, before we get started let’s dip our toes in the warm waters that are new years resolutions, new years goals, new years whatever-you-wanna-call-em. Yeah sure, they can be a great motivator for those first few months, weeks, or days (lol) of the year but how do you actually be sure you accomplish them?! I don’t necessarily like to call them new years resolutions; I prefer to call/make them into goals. The best way to set goals is to make them achievable, measurable and to set benchmarks so you can make it happen. Keep them posted on a sticky on your desktop, in your planner, or just somewhere that you’ll see them everyday. Keep em in the front of your mind!

As someone who personally has a track record of forgetting about these so-called resolutions half way through the year, I feel you if this is something you struggle with. Let’s just be honest about it, y’all. Things are not going to change unless you do something to change them! 2019 has the potential to be your year so get in there and pave your path to whatever your heart desires.

There’s always been the mantra of “new year, new me” and it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. As good as it can feel to “leave it all behind in 2018” I don’t honestly think it’s possible. This season is all about reflection: of where we’ve come from and where we have been. Use what you have learned whether it be from success or from failure TO YOUR ADVANTAGE. You don’t have to shut out all of the bad to get to the good! It’ll help you to grow. Learn from 2018, and use it to BE better and DO better in 2019. Because of 2018, you are changed!

With all this talk of change and goal-setting for a better year, here’s a peak into what I have challenged myself to achieve this year!

  1. Move more confidently and fearlessly. This is your life, and you are the one who has the ability to make things different. Confidence for me has come with age as well as out of hardships and challenges. I want to continue to learn from mistakes and work on being more confident in the decisions I am making in my life. Will this be my most difficult goal for the year? Heck to the yes. It’s not as much of a check yes or no goal but I think I’ll be able to look back by the end of the year to see whether or not I’ve moved confidently to get to that point!
  2. Learn to be more spontaneous. This seems to be a reoccurring pattern of mine as I did have a similar goal for myself this year. I definitely improved on that but I still have ways to go! As a TYPE A, it is sooo challenging to go off the books and be spontaneous. But it’s so rewarding to be able to live in the moment (even if it’s just for a day or two). With my new job (I’ll be a traveling consultant for my sorority this upcoming school year) that I’m starting in July, I think this’ll be easier to make happen. I won’t have a home-base per say, so jumping from place to place will 100 percent take me out of my comfort zone and methodical-like schedule I’ve been stuck in. Maybe I’ll try a new Starbucks drink or get another sub at Jimmy Johns that’s not the Vito? The options are truly endless.
  3. Take the time to be selfish. Ok, this may sound bad but hear me out? I’m going to be traveling for a living, going from place to place, mostly alone, at the back half of 2019. As a soon-to-be 22 year-old, I really feel like this is my time. It’s my opportunity to learn about myself, to do things for myself without reason! I may as well take this time in my early-twenties to be selfish, while I still can.
  4. Continue to journal (if not daily at least weekly). If you’ve read the blog before, you have definitely heard me talk about my newfound love for journaling. I LIVE FOR IT. Don’t know about y’all, but for me there is something about writing the thoughts in my head down on paper that is extremely therapeutic. I want to be able to look back through all my journals in the future and see my growth!
  5. Make a big girl purchase. Maybe a bag or pair of shoes? Still accepting suggestions, so let me know what y’all got. With me finally getting my first big-girl job after school, I am really wanting to buy myself something that I’ll have forever! It’s gonna feel amazing when I can actually afford something nice for myself! But until then, catch me with my fake Gucci :/
  6. NEW YORK AND CALIFORNIA. I’ll be traveling for a living, but I gotta get my butt back to New York (it’s one of my favorite places in the world…I’m obsessed with all of it) in order to keep me sane!! California has been on my bucket list forever so fingers crossed I can visit this spring!
  7. Find the joy in the little things. Like I’ve previously, stated my type A personality doesn’t always allow me to stop and enjoy the little things. In an effort to be a more appreciative person in general, I think finding happiness in the little things, no matter how small, is the best way to start!
  8. Even in those ruts, continue to create. This year especially, I allowed myself to shut down if I was stuck in a creative rut. This year I want to push myself to keep on creating when I’m not motivated to. Easier said then done, but some of my best work has come from pushing through that bump in the road. Being a self-proclaimed profectionist hasn’t helped me thus far, but I’m hoping my change in scenery will be inspiring to say the least!
  9. Money! Management! Yeah, I really gotta start adulting and get my money in track. I am a shopahaulic which complicates my saving money an awful lot lol. This year, I hope to start CONSISTENTLY saving a part of my paycheck. When I’m done traveling, I gotta start real life and there’s gonna be hella expenses/bills to pay. So if you see me spending copious amounts of money before I put my pre-portioned savings in it’s account, feel free to smack me across the face. I’ll thank ya later.

WHEW. Ok that was a mouthful. If you’re still reading, thank you. You’re an angel. Anyone wanna talk 2019 or even 2018? Leave me a comment below or message me on Instagram! Cheers to where we’ve come from and cheers to where we are headed!

xoxo

Knowing your self-worth

Posted in Lifestyle
on 10/17/2018

Hi y’all! I’m baaaaccck today with a #girltalk. Since this summer, these types of posts have been my absolute favorite to write. Being vulnerable on the internet can be scary, so I hope you’ll read this and it’ll be what you need to hear.

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Self-worth. How do we value ourselves? Do we have too little self-worth and continue to let people walk all over us or do we have oodles of it which drive us to be a total bad ass babe? If you’re asking about me, I would like to think I fall in the middle of the spectrum but that’s not entirely true. Self-worth has a lot of grey areas and I think that’s why I had such a difficult time sitting down to write this blog post. Shoutout to y’all for requesting posts like these that challenge me to think.

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I often hear the word self-worth in conjunction to relationships – whether they be boys or just friendships. Do you really not have enough self-worth to tell him something? You’re really gonna let her treat you like that? Clearly you don’t see how much your friendship really worth. 

As a chronically single twenty-one year old, a lot of times I find myself looking at self-worth when it comes to boys. If there is anything I have learned from the many times that things didn’t work out with a boy it’s this: just because he can’t see your worth, does NOT mean you don’t have it. You have to stay hopeful. As a self-proclaimed romantic (thank you rom-coms for making me this way), I have to think that someday things will work out. Someday there will be someone who can see all that I’m worth. But until then, I have to ride out this wave of life (even with all of it’s ups and downs) until that time comes. Keep doin you girl, there’s really no better way to respect yourself than that.

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In my opinion, self-worth is allowing yourself to experience things, to live life, get hurt. I don’t think self-worth necessarily relates to guarding yourself from anything and everything that could break you, but instead it means embracing it. Life is never going to be perfect, and you’re not always going to be happy. But being able to allow those experiences, whether they be good or bad happen and actually LEARN from them, now that to me is the true meaning of self-worth. You owe it to yourself to get heartbroken, try something new, and learn who your true friends are.

So let’s start looking at things this way: respect yourself enough to be strong and confident in your decisions – you know what’s right for you! Not anyone else. Get out there and LIVE, y’all. It will be worth it in the end. Only you can change your perspective on life. If you find yourself in a negative situation, live it and LEARN from it. You’ve only made yourself much stronger because of it.

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When you’re feeling down, or maybe not worthy of someone tell yourself this: I am worth it. I am enough. You don’t need validation from someone else to tell you what you’re worth. They don’t know your thoughts, they don’t know the struggles you’ve been through to get here, they don’t know the whole you. And if they did, then they certainly would be able to see ALL YOUR VALUE, ALL YOUR WORTH. It’s there, it’s always been there and it’ll be there for the rest of your life. So start acting like it. You are so worth it.

If you’re struggling with self-worth, try to take a bit of time each day to tell yourself something you love about yourself. One of my favorite things to do is to have a constant reminder so I’ll often set a quote I’m loving as my phone background. I’m sharing a few of my recent favorites with y’all below.

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YOU ARE ENOUGH. And if you needed to hear that today, hear it from me. SO much love for all of y’all who read! XOXO

 

Dealing with self-doubt

Posted in Lifestyle
on 08/30/2018

There’s something I’ve been struggling with lately: self-doubt. Maybe it’s the fact that I’m expected to be a real adult in less than 10 months, or maybe it’s the fact that I haven’t had much time to think about anything these past few weeks (thanks, recruitment)? Possibly it’s the combination of both, but all I know for sure is that I have felt off. 

Self-doubt is definitely a huge player in the game that is my life. I’m a type A personality, so I constantly have an internal battle going on. As my biggest critic, there’s always thoughts running through my mind of self-doubt.

Here’s a few things I’ve been doing to help curb this feeling!

JOURNALING

My FAVORITE thing I’ve taken from my #selfishsummer was journaling. I *tried* to make it a daily thing, but when things got busy it was more like one-two times a week thing. BUT STILL. I cannot explain how much better I feel after putting it allll out there on the pages of my journal. It’s extremely therapeutic especially if you’ve got a mind that runs a million miles a minute like mine. Get yourself a journal, decorate it and make it your own, and use it!

 POSITIVE THOUGHTS

When I’m down on myself, I like to flip back through my social media/camera roll to see how far I’ve come. Even since the beginning of this year I’ve grown so much! In January of 2018, I wouldn’t have been able to move 10 hours away from home for the summer. But hey! I did it and it made me a much stronger, more independent person. So when I’m feeling doubtful, I remind myself of everything I’ve already accomplished.

KEEP ON MOVING

Sometimes I think the best way to kick those ugly feelings to the curb is just to keep pushing. To keep moving and have faith you know where you’re headed. This might not work for everyone, but I know that for me it’s one of the best ways to do things. If I keep my mind occupied on other tasks then I have less time to doubt myself.

Life is definitely a journey and not a destination. By helping yourself along the way, it’ll make things a lot more fun! I’ll promise you that. So the next time you’re feeling a bit of self-doubt, take a step back. You’re a lot stronger than you think.

Cheers to getting back into the swing of things and a new school year!

xoxo

Mid summer recap + reflection

Posted in Lifestyle
on 07/01/2018

HELLLERRRR my friends. Feels like it’s been AWHILE. Since the summer is about halfway through for most of you *cue the sobs* I wanted to check in and give y’all a lil life update. Most of you voted for some more girl talk kind of posts via my Insta stories a few weeks ago (thank you if you voted ILY A MILLI) so here I am delivering!

If you are new to LGIP, let me fill ya in. I moved to Fayetteville, AR this summer for an internship at RiffRaff. I moved here not knowing A SINGLE SOUL. Man, was it intimidating. I mean, I guess I would consider myself a pretty friendly person and I honestly believe I could talk to anyone (if you know me IRL you know I am a talker). I was scared, but I knew that I would be able to make friends if I put myself out there. Well I am happy to report, I have friends! Good friends, no, GREAT FRIENDS up here in Arkansas. Friendships don’t come easy and I will say opening up right away with all of these girls it has paid off.

Coming up here and being 10 hours away from home (I miss you NOLA) has been hard. I’m not gonna lie to y’all I have a had a mental breakdown or two up here. Nothing a fountain coke, bath, and drive around town at night can’t fix right? Wrong. I’m not here to complain about being away from home because it was all my decision to take this leap of faith but I don’t want y’all to think it’s been all sunshine and rainbows. I mean, hey, I miss home ALL THE TIME but I am trying to make the most of this amazing opportunity being up here by myself for the whole summer.

I’ve taken up journaling this summer too and it’s made HUGE difference. Keeping all of my thoughts caged up inside is not healthy. I enjoy getting them all out onto paper each night. Not only is it extremely therapeutic, but I really crack myself up and I love going back and reading my old journal entries.

Being up here has sparked a period of extreme growth for me. I mean, not having my family and friends to rely on 24/7 is really challenging. I am sooo used to living in the sorority house where you’re never alone, so being alone like this was a bit of a culture shock for me. My mom has always told me I was independent and I’ve seen that quality in myself this summer. I LOVE doing things alone.  My solo Target trips, drives around town, and dinners are truly some of my favorite things to do. Being alone isn’t something to be ashamed of so why should I stay cooped up at home? I guess this segways great into my next topic: boys.

Oh god, I hate em, I love em, and feel everything between for em. Y’all have heard me talk about boys before on LGIP and this is a subject I’m not ashamed to speak on. Yes, I am still single as a pringle. Yes, it’s hard seeing all of my friends and EVERY SINGLE PERSON on my Insta timeline in relationships when I am far from that. But I think at this point in my life, as much as I may resent it, being single is what I need. I needed this time to take care of myself. There is a time and place for boys I guess for me, it’s just not now?

I am not saying I’m anti boy AT ALL. For me personally, I’ve decided that if talking to a boy makes me question my self-worth I don’t think it’s what I should be striving for. If a boy doesn’t answer my Snapchat it by no means degrades me. It doesn’t make me any less me. I’ll eventually find someone who will want to talk to me, regardless of how weird I am! That day is just not today?! This is something that sometimes I feel like I’ve conquered this feeling, but other days I let it get to me. I’m a work in progress as I should be. I hope some of you girls can relate to this. I know it’s a feeling I’ve been feeling for quite some time now. Being single is ok. Being single is awesome!

As I hinted to earlier, I have had a mental breakdown or two this summer. Mostly “WTF am I doing?” “Why don’t I have a boyfriend?” and other classic quarter-life crisis questions. I’ll admit to feeling trapped. Being away from home has really urged me to want to travel and get out of my comfort zone. Moving to Arkansas was a huge step for me and it’s really challenged me to get out of my daily routine. I am a creature of habit, so sometimes that break in the routine can be really tough. But I really needed to be able to take a break in my routine so it’s been good.

Moving away from home has sparked an urge for travel. Not kidding, I dreaaaammm of getting out and seeing the world. Especially this summer, I cannot stop thinking about it. Maybe the fact that my time living in Louisiana will come to an end soon? My travel bucket list right now consists of: SoCal, NYC, Arizona and Austin, TX. It’s been great to get out of good ole Louisiana, but I will say it’s made me realize there truly is no place like home. I’m not so sure Louisiana is my vibe, but I guess I’ll have to travel a bit out of school and see where I feel at home? It’ll all come soon I guess (in less than a year from now I’ll be a college grad holy cow I cannot think that far ahead lol).

Sooooo if you’re still here after ALL OF THIS- thanks. No really, thanks for reading, following along, commenting on my Instagram posts – I really appreciate all of you! I hope you’ll continue to follow along with me on my adventures as I enter this INSANE season of life. LOTS N LOTS OF LOVE.

Here’s the link to my set: top and bottom. It’s been one of my faves lately – no really I’ve been wearing it allll weekend lol.